Shanghai from the Bund

Alas, we, meaning the children and I, are back in America. Chris is still living and lovin' being in China!! The transition back is almost as rough as the transition going to China. The one difference is that everyone here speaks English. Not that anyone understands me any better, they just supposedly speak the same language. I guess my body language has changed significantly enough that I connot convey my meaning to my fellow Americans - or at least the ones that work the register at Petco!!

You see, Denali's pet snake, Nagini, escaped from the cage. Notice that I refrain from using his or her since we do not know which it is. I know it is still in the living room somewhere, because our dog won't go in there. I think he was attacked by it. Off, I go to petco to see if they sell snake traps, food that my lure a snake out of hiding, or just have a suggestion on how to catch the thing. I think they were trying to tell me to stand there with my mouth open and hope that the snake finds this warm moist spot. That is what they had to be saying as no words came from their open mouths.

You know that guy that lives with me, well he suggested that the workers might not have the ability to speak. Fine, can the write? If not, they should not be working the front counter. Is that to harsh of me? Well, I have a snake loose in my house and my dog will not come out of his cage and my children call me a mei guo hater. Mei Guo is America in Chinese. So one can figure out their implications....

I am not a mei guo hater. I love America. I just think that someone at Petco should have some advice on catching a snake - Afterall, they sold my husband the thing. I also am very mad at Verizon Wireless - Not America. Although America is letting Verizon get away with it. I bought my cell phone them. I fufilled my 2 year contract with them. I pay my bill on time. Why then, can I not get the pictures I took with my camera off my phone and onto my computer using my USB connector without paying them $1? It's not like I am sending it to anyone!!! It's robbery I tell you.

Alright already, let's get on with our Shanghai adventure. It is Chinese New Year and everything in Qingdao is closed. Not a restaurant open anywhere. We are five hungry people. Chris does not have to work, so we had to Shanghai for a few days. If a Westerner is going to live in China - this is the place to be. Some signs are actually bilingual. Some people even speak English. It is very easy to find familiar food. We actaully went to dinner on the Bund and met an American family that had three children. Not only that, they used to live in Henniker, NH. What are the odds of that? 5000 people live in Henniker and 18 million live in Shanghai. We even had a mutual friend! The odds are actually a bit better then expected, if you consider it was an arranged meeting with a friend of a friend of friend of a friend....but it is still a story worth telling!

In Shanghai we meet Alex. (Chris's translator) He is from Shanghai so he was home for the Lunar New Year, hui jia. Day 1 we spent at the Aquarium without a camera. My pictures are on my cell phone, but Verizon wants to charge me $1 per picture to get them off my phone. Can you believe it!!! There were far more Westerners there then we had seen in months, but far fewer then I had expected. Apparently there were also alot of visitors as people still wanted to pose for pictures with my children.

Day 2 we went to the zoo. It was a wild animal zoo, with a safari section. The safari included a bus ride. We saw every kind of animal you can imagine...kangaroos, cheetahs, lions...They even had a liger - lion father and tiger mother - pic below. Chris thought it to be an abomination. I thought it was gentically pretty cool. Outside the bus window we saw some yaks. Everyone thought it was a cow. I told them that cows are girls, they laugh at me and ask if I have ever seen "Back to the Barnyard". No wonder milk tastes so different in China.

At the panda cage, Jackson has his picture taken as much as the pandas!!! For a fee, you could pose for a picture with an elephant and/or Jackson - He has started charging at this point. So we did...charge, I mean take a picture with an elephant. I have posted a video. The girls got on top of the elephant and Jackson got to sit on the trunk and get lifted. Never in America!!! Listen closely to the voices in the video. I am nowhere to be seen or heard - I was hiding from fear. Chris is telling the elephant that it is OK to eat Jackson and all the Zhong guo ren (Chinese people) can be heard yelling "Mei You" - Never!!!!

We went to the Yu garden. Apparently this is a must for the Chinese people to do over New Year and during their life. One must also walk across the bridge for good luck. This place was so crowded, that when I lifted my feet, I was still suspended. The kids pick out some traditional Chinese clothes. For the next three days, I could not get these outfits off of them!! Denali dress size was a women's Large - Obviously I wasn't buying anything for me!!!

If you look right under the camera in the center of the picture, you can make out Jackson's eye!!!

We also went for a drive across the longest bridge in China. It is 30km long. there is no turning around either. Once you are on the bridge you are committed to getting to the other side. The weather was quite bad, but we perservered. I wondered aloud to where the bridge lead and was told that it went there - with a point in the direction we were heading. What is there I question. "That is where we are going." Hey, at least it was an answer, which is more than I got at Petco!!!

After arriving there...it turns out that this bridge leads to an island that is in deep water so that cargo ships can load and unload. The weather is terrible, but the is a huge set of step that will take you to the top of the island to get a better view. We all say it is to cold and wet to climb, so we head up the steps. The view was worth it in the end and the weather began to clear.

We had spent the day with Alex and his family. Alex's dad kept calling Jackson "Tiao Qi". I thought it meant cute. Actually it meant naughty. Someone to see thru Jack's cute facade.

Down the hill we go so that we can drive the 30km back across the bridge and into Shanghai where we all went to a fairwell dinner. The next day we were flying back to Qingdao, to pack and get ready to go home!!

Golden Hans BBQ

Since we came to Qingdao I have wanted to try this one restaurant. It is a South American bar-b-Que with draught beer. How could I go wrong? I have driven passed in a taxi, I have driven passed it on a bus, I have flown over it and even have walked passed it on an occasion. Every time I tried to get there to eat, I never made it.

I took a bus there once. The bus stop was opposite on the opposite side of an 8 lane road with a divided 4 lane highway in the middle. I could not cross the street. I asked a few passersby how I could get to the other side of the street and they indicated by gesturing, that I should just walk. This was early on in my Qingdao experience and thus I could not thank them properly for their advice. You see the streets here in China are equivalent to the game croaker. At least, that is how my three kids see it. We see how far we can get before we have to side step a car or jump out of the way of a motorcycle or duck under a bus. Much to my chagrin Jackson and Denali try to see just how close they can get to a car that is speeding by. McKinley on the hand, clings to my side and tries to convince us to wait for the light to turn red. I have explained to her that his would work if 1.there was a light to turn red and 2. drivers actually paid attention to them.

I tried to get there by taxi, but never made it. Apparently I told the driver I wanted to go buy some gold and ended up in a jewelery store. Did I mention that there is "gold" in the name of the restaurant and so I really wasn't that far off.

I tried to get Chris's co-workers to take me there and they never did. Apparently I speak a foreign language and could not convince them where it was that I wanted to go eat. People in China, Zhong Gua Ren, answer their phones by saying wei (pronounced way). I think it is short for Dui (pronounced dway) which means yes. In any case, all I have to do is answer a phone with "wei" and I can confuse them. By them I am referring to Alex whose picture is in the previous post. I think it is such an unexpected way for a Mei Gua Ren (American) to answer the phone that it catches him off guard. So, if you have have a Zhong Gua Ren call you try answering with "wei".

We have just about 2 weeks left in China and thus I had to get to this restaurant. Armed with my maps, the name of the restaurant in English, Chinese and pinyin I marched the family off for dinner. I had the phone number, and as a back up I brought a picture of the restaurant I had cut out of a magazine. The advertisement said that a highlight of this restaurant is that one can find "cowboys in lederhosen". Have I mentioned that there is a big German influence in Qingdao? Seriously, cowboys in lederhosen I just had to get there.

Well I should have known that I was in for a treat when the cab driver, upon realizing where I wanted to go, became very animated. He told me that the food there was great. The beer was even better. He has eaten there many times. My Chinese is much better.....he understands me and tells me that I should have a great time.

After 2 months in Qingdao, we have come to disagree with the American sentiment that if a lot of Chinese folk eat in a restaurant it must be good Chinese food. We, in fact, look for the places that are mostly empty except for say a few foreigners - us!!!! We arrive at the restaurant and it is full of Zhong Gua Ren - not a Mei Gua Ren in sight. Turns out that it is quite a nice place. The cowboys walk around and serve you each of 20 different BBQ foods. then there is a large hot and cold buffet to choose side dishes from. I knew things were not going according to plan when the waiter came to ask our beer choice. Chris's remark was, "don't get me any of that sh@#." What - what, where is his sense of adventure - i order two mugs of whatever is "Yellow"

The first food brought to our plate is shrimp. I am still conversing with the waiter trying to get 3 glasses of apple juice when Chris says, "Whatever you do, don't eat the shrimp." WTF. The next selection that is brought to our table is a skewer of chicken hearts. Saying, "I'll pass", did not prevent the cowboys in lederhosen from serving it anyway. Jackson is green. Denali wants to dissect it and look for four chambers. McKinley asks, "Mom is it OK if I don't eat anything?"

By this point my head spins, my eyes are bulging and then vein in the middle of my forehead is pulsating!!! Do you get the picture. We all head up to the buffet. McKinley and Jack return from 4 huge table of food with watermelon and cucumbers, Denali has a plate of rice and corn and Chris come back with nothing!!!!!!! Luckily when we return to the table, our plates are filled with 18 more BBQ items. Every will try one or I will kill them!!! The desert selection was rather good and in the end the wait staff all paid 10RMB each to Jackson to pose for a picture with them.

Throughout the whole dinner we had a large audience. it wasn't till the bill arrived that I understood why....here are some of the things that were BBQ'd:

• Pickled Ox Tongue
• Black Pepper Bowel
• Roasted Squid
• Shu Joss-stick of falty cow - "Male member" - I actually enjoyed this one. Yes, Chris tried it too. I hear the jokes now......
• Pickled Chicken Heart
• Fragrant Pig Foot

So, if you ever find yourself in Qingdao, China looking for a place to eat, may I recommend Golden Hans, South American BBQ and Beer Garden.

A Second Opinion on China

This Blog installment is a guest submission. The author would like
everyone to realize that his China experience is not as easy as I make it
out to be.

The Work-a day world:

Daily life in a Chinese factory is much like in the US but with many more people and no heat in the winter. This means we sit in the office wearing sweaters and winter jackets, Alex the translator models the normal office attire below. The amazing part is that nobody thinks anything of sitting in an office at 50F for eight hours clutching a hot water bottle to keep your hands warm enough to type. We’re lucky in the office. The plant has absolutely no heat and the workers deal with whatever the weather brings.

The plant staff, like most people in China, are a good spirited group with a lot of enthusiasm for the new things going on at the plant. They get a big kick out my attempts at Chinese. I can generally break up the room with any three word Chinese sentence. Guess I’m funny.

There is one big difference between my Chinese office and any plant in America where I have worked. The facilities are lacking as you can see below.

Now, I’m not generally squeamish. I went to camp. I’ve roughed it. I’ve even had to make my own TP on occasion from whatever mother nature offers. These things raise all kinds of questions. By the way, this is actually a nice bathroom in comparison to many of the more “local” offerings.

The Chinese exchange teacher at the kid’s school came to our house for a dinner just before we left for China. She actually sat on the couch and said with a straight face, “Oh, we don’t have any squat toilets in China anymore. You won’t see those.” I kept my mouth shut so as not to scare Jill and the girls.

The room itself raises questions but is pretty typical of Chinese plumbing outside the big hotels. Straight and level are not part of the work instructions when hanging fixtures, pictures, walls, masonry, plumbing, electrical lines, road signs or really anything that will not fail structurally or functionally as a result of being off-plumb.

The really interesting part, aside from the craftsmanship, is the stuff growing on the wall above the tile. It’s not just mold from a roof leak saturating the block. It is actually a very fluffy mineral secretion coming out of the wall with the consistency of cotton balls. The wall has actually sprouted a two inch thick snowy white beard. Really neat. I have seen this stuff all over China even in the lobbies of 5 Star hotels. A little water damage doesn’t seem to bother, see the comment above about structural impacts.

The prospects of anything but a short visit (read as standing up) to these things means you take extra special care in planning your day. This is a whole new meaning to daily planning – the consequences of going off-schedule are not to be considered. At least for me, I’ll go back to the apartment by claiming to have a case of the vapors.

We found out early in our stay in China that water is served warm to hot. Cold water is considered bad for your stomach whereas warm water is good for your Chi. Initially, hot water was undrinkable with meals. Now, meh! Not so much.

The other benefit of hot water is the HOT part. When your office environs are at 50F for eight to ten hours, your body begins to give up on heating some of the extra bits like feet, arms, fingers, ears and noses. Again, typing suffers and reduces productivity forcing the hiring of several more people to cover the work load. At 1500 – 2000 RMB a month ($200 - $400), still cheaper than heat plus we’d need another three or four guys to shovel coal into the furnace.

Well, once you discover that drinking hot water improves the flow of blood to your extremities (not to mention the Chi benefits), you drink hot water all day long. I literally drink eight or ten big travel mugs of hot water, with or without instant coffee crystals, during the course of the day. This requires me to visit the room of requirement every 30 minutes without fail.

Since I’m in their so much, I’ve been thinking about upgrading the facilities. Nothing fancy, just something to improve the atmosphere. The owner told me I could do anything I wanted to make my time in China more pleasant so I pimped that puppy. Now that’s good for my Chi.

Beijing

As I begin the installment of Chinese Budlight I shall diverge for a moment and explain the 2 week delay in posting. The last 2 weeks have been packed with excitement and plenty of material to include in a blog - Like Chris singing Karoke - but occasionally computer glitches, camera problems, all sort of things come up. I persevere. I do not give up and after so many tries, I think this entry may finally get uploaded.

After a few attempts and rewrites, the blog will be posted. You see my father has finally seen and read the blog. He resents the fact that I resent the fact that he is living in my house, has burned thru my 2 cords of wood and was instrumental in having a tree limb crush Chris's car. This would not be so bad, except that while I am in China being resentful, he is my house hosting a family from Delaware. Mother, father, sister, husband, two kids. Apparently, they bond so well over the blog and the fact that they have children in China. They bond so well, that that they forget they have children in China. That is not really fair, my father did call to tell me he resents that fact the I refer to him as the man in my house.

Let's say there is this lady from Delaware that has been married to the same man for 44 years. Let's even say that they have a son. This son and his family are living in China. This son and his family go out of the way to set up online accounts, local phone numbers, everything , so that people can contact them. Well this lady was able to contact the family to ask if she could stay in their house - but once at the house, no Christmas call, no New Years call, no how are you and the kids call. Now lets say that this lady married to this man for 44 years does not even think to mention to this man not to mention the blog to the father. I know, the blog is public domain. Anyone can read it. It would have gone over so much easier, if I showed it to my father, if he stumbled upon it himself, anything other than this man that has been married to this lady for 44 years pointing out the blog to him.

I guess I should thank them though. They brought their other two grandchildren with them. You knows the ones that got wished a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Well one of these two grandchildren left a Thomas the train tank engine in my father's shoe. First it was nothing. then it was a bloody mess, then it required a podiatrist and antibiotics. Well now I find out that it requires surgery. They can't do surgery until his circulation improves and the medicine he is on is changed. What will things be like when I return. I guess the good thing is at least that guy in my house is talking to me again. Dad - I did not refer to you as the guy living in my house this time.

As of today, we leave China and hui jia mei gua - head homeward to America - in 3 weeks!!! It's hard to believe that our time is almost up. It is with such mixed emotions that we prepare to leave. Even Jackson said, "mom part of me want to stay and the other part really wants to go home." I just told him that it is a good thing that the decision is not ours to make. Would we actually go home right about now, or would wait until the whole toe saga is over?

Picking up where I last left off.....the day after Christmas we get up bright and early and catch a plane to Beijing. We are checked into a hotel and Chris is off at work by 9am. Our Beijing host arranged for a walking tour of Beijing for me and the children, so we head into the city. We walk over to Tienanmen Square and the Mao Mosuleum. Then we head into the Forbidden City. This tour guide knew everything and anything you could imagine about Beijing History, the forbidden city, the Qing dynasty and the Ming dynasty. He also did not understand a word of the Chinese I spoke. Apparently I speak Chinese with a Qingdao accent and mispronounced everything. I tried to tell him that I mispronounce everything in Qingdao as well, but they still understand me!!!

Beijing is a much bigger city then Qingdao. 18 million compared to 7 million. Needless to say that there were also many more Westerners, so at least we did not stick out like sore thumbs. At least that is what I thought until we got to the Birds Nest stadium where Jackson charged everyone 10RMB to pose for a picture with them. He earned our entrance fees!!! Next year in school Denali will study China, so she made the guide repeat everything like 5 times. If I hear one more word about mythical creatures, you know those fictitious animals that are all around the palaces, I may scream. That mythical creature is a dragon in a turtle shell and that one is a phoenix and the number of mythical creatures upon the roof of the buildings indicate how close the family that lived there is to the emperor. Wait...I need to type s-l-o-w-e-r so that Denali can write each word for school. M y t h i c a l.....McKinley and Jackson are sick and tired of walking at this point and want to go home. We have been walking for more the 4 hours and are just getting to the far end of the forbidden city.

I convince the guide that we do not need to walk back thru the forbidden city and can leave the back gate. "But, But you have not finished counting mythical creatures". Oh yes I have. We get into a taxi and take a driving tour of the other side of the forbidden city. This is were actual people actually live. Inside the wall of the forbidden City Suddenly the kids see a frozen lake. The once tired and drained of all energy children are out of the cab and running on the lake. I rent two carts for them to scoot around on. I know, I should have rented three - but they were 2 seaters. McKinley refused to share hers, no surprise there. Jackson just wanted to sit and Denali wanted to push a cart and run around like a maniac. No surprises there either. I thought the arrangement was fine and headed up off the ice. OMG - I can't leave me kids alone on the ice - they may get hurt. Believe me, they may get hurt even if I am there. My tour guide tells me I am a brave mother, it is brave not to be so overprotective - i tell him my favorite quote - There is a fine line between bravery and stupidity. We leave and the guide stuffs us into a taxi and tells the taxi driver to take us back to our hotel. I get that feeling again....

....I just started getting comfortable in Qingdao taxi's, now I am in Beijing. This cab driver is not happy about something. Not that I could understand him, but he was gesticulating wildly and kept pointing to his clock. We stop at a red light and he jumps out of the cab. OMG. The light turns green, horns are honking, McKinley is screaming and Jackson and Denali and fighting!!! I look out the back window and see our cab driver giving the cab driver behind us some money. We are then ushered out of his cab and into the cab behind us. I don't have a lifeline, I don't have a hotel card, I don't have any idea where I am. Did I mention that my cell phone is dead!!!! There must have been a hint of panic on my face - you think- because this cab driver seemed to take pity on me. Either that, or he really wanted to practice his English.

Between his English and my Chinese, we actually communicated rather well. I think they call what we were speaking Chinglish. This driver gets us safely back to our hotel. It is 6pm by now. Do you think Chris was at the hotel waiting for or worried about us - no he is still off playing with his friends.

The next day the company driver picks us up and we are off to the Birds Nest stadium and the Summer palace. Truly amazing. Not only do we have a driver, but we have Kelly with us. Kelly speaks very good English. Her job with Paragon is as a translator. Chris does not understand why things so hard for me in China. Everything so easy for him. It has nothing to do with the fact that he goes everywhere with a driver and translator, while the four of us are left on own. We make the mistake of driving past the frozen lake again - can you tell the kids are from NH - and everyone jumps out of the car and goes running down to the lake. That is everyone except the driver, Chris and Kelly. I eventually convince the driver that he and Kelly can leave, but they must not take Chris with them!!! Guess who won that battle. I rent two more carts.

Things not go so well this time. Apparently, a catastrophic event on the ice caused Jackson to run for shelter behind my leg. Out of pure hatred Denali returns her cart to punish herself. McKinley not wanting to be left on the ice alone returns her cart. This made no sense to me, because McKinley was ignoring her brother and sister anyway. At this precise moment Denali decides her punishment is over and want to go back on the ice. Both carts were returned - she is SOL. The tears, the screams...what to do. We head off walking and find a Reggae Bar - yes, a reggae bar in China!!! Bob Marley, cervesca, dread locks!!!! Things really get rocking as we are the only costumers.

It's getting late so we decide to head back to the hotel in as much as we have to catch a train in the morning. Only where to find a taxi, where is our hotel, what to do - sound familiar? Everything so easy for Chris in China - I leave this up to him. We end up walking thru alleys, thru backlots, stuck in dead ends, thru dark streets of Beijing - McKinley is crying again why we always lost mommy, why? I see a cab, no lights, but it is a cab. He off duty. I talk Chinese to him, make him laugh. Jackson pours on the charm......he will take us to the hotel. Chris is saved once again.

The next day we catch the high speed train from Beijing to Qingdao. Nice train, nice train station, nice people, but the bathrooms were bad. I mean they triggered my gag reflex. We finally make it back to Qingdao - it's good to be home - hey this isn't home. Here is a final pic of us arriving in Qingdao and heading home. Next installment - Xin Nian Hoa - Happy new Year

Christmas in Qingdao

Christmas has come and gone. All I have to say, is that this Christmas will go down in History as one of the strangest. Not that strange is a bad thing. We started the holiday off with a Christmas party in Laoshan park. It was wonderful. There were 50 families. We were all there for a scavenger hunt, bird release, monkey feed, lunch and a show. In as much as I understand even less Chinese then I attempt to speak, I really had no idea what was going on most of the time. We followed the group around most of the time. Everyone was given a bird to release and then we got to go inside the monkey house. I thought they food they were giving out were snacks until the monkeys grabbed them. I am known in China for eating animal food.

The show was a group of Chinese children performing Scooby Doo in English. It was very entertaining. The kids had memorized all their lines, but didn't really know what they were saying. Denali pointed that out to me because the character of Shaggy said like for every other like work, you know what I like mean. Whenever he said like he like uh lacked that dazed look and just said like, like it was another word. Denali said, "I don't think he like gets it." Next the called all foreigners on stage to sing a Christmas song in their native language. I had a very hard time convincing my children that they were the foreigners. Jackson never made it on stage, because he is not a foreigner. Denali refused to let me sing, I embarrass her enough just by existing.

After the party, we went home and got ready for Christmas Eve mass. It was way at the other end of town, so we took a taxi. The Catholic church here in Qingdao is Korean, so guess what, mass was in Korean. The church is huge and of course it is not heated. Jackson was able to get the lady next to him to share her blanket with him, the rest of us, we froze. I am not sure of the age that children here make their first communion, but it must be older then 8. I say that because, they did not give McKinley communion. She stood there defiantly, but in the end returned to her seat without it. I told her it tasted like fish and she was OK. After mass we walked around trying to find a cab, or a bus. We ended up finding a family restaurant. lots and lots of kids that have never seen people that look like us before. We tried to hide in a corner, bu they kept staring anyway. I still don't know what happened, but that meal was in the top 3 worst food experiences we have had in China. I guess Medium Well in this restaurant means make sure it is dead. We see a store, buy a few bottles of wine and a few bags of chocolate and home. Thank god for chocolate and wine.

Christmas morning was great. Nice, quiet. Well the wii saga continues. Santa brought a remote sensor, guitar hero, and many new games. Nothing worked, I mean nothing. Why would I think anything would work. Apparently the wii is not programed to work in China. How does the wii even know that I am in China. So we head off to Jimo Lu with the wii. By this time my wii is in pieces and they are soldering it back together!!!! I should have taken a picture of that.


After they are done working on my wii we head off to Tai Dong Lu for Mexican Food. Tai Dong Lu is what I always imagined China to look like. Bright lights, millions of people, outside escalators, and vendors covering every inch of the sidewalk. Yes, we went out for Mexican food on Christmas night. After a couple of beers, Chris decides to get his hair cut in the shop next door. I bring out Chris's ipod and a picture of Tony Stark (Iron Man). I thought I told the stylist that I want my husband to look like this picture, but I think I told the stylist that I want Tony Stark for my husband, because he was extra nice to Chris. I mean this haircut lasted forever. We all know about Chris's patience, but even mine had run out. Chris rips off that cover thing they use and then gestures a neck slicing motion and tries to leave. So, they wash his hair again thinking he is itchy!!! The haircut is done, he looks great, not like Tony Stark, but it is passable. We decide to head home.....

It is freezing, it is rush area, we have to go the bathroom and we can't get a cab. Chris decides to get on the first bus that comes by to warm up. This bus is a bus number I haven't seen in my 2 months in Qingdao. It's warm, What can the harm be? So we get on the bus and the bus goes and goes and goes. I have no idea where I am, I see no land marks, I don't even know what direction we have been heading in, when suddenly the bus stops and everyone is kicked off the bus!!! Jackson and McKinley were asleep!!! The bus is pulling into the terminal..Last stop. There is nothing around. Can you hear Chris now, welcoming me to the underbelly of China......Christmas luck did not fail us. Within 10 minutes of walking a taxi stops. I tell the driver where I want to go. I'm pretty sure that he was telling me that he is not going to drive that far, but I tell everyone to get in anyway. I pretend to know nothing except my address. That's all I would say, and eventually we mad it to familiar territory.

Now, the story should end here, but it doesn't. I gave the girls these hairclips for Christmas. When you buy these particular hair clips, you can bring them back to the shop anytime and get your hair done. They just had to use the Christmas present. I may have also told McKinley that I would take her to get her hair done when we made it out of where ever we were just to get her to stop. So we get out of the taxi and go get our hair braided. A huge crowd gathers round to watch the girls get their hair done. Chris is holding out his hat to collect money!!! By this time it is rather late and we must go straight home because we leave for Beijing at 6am. Can you guess the topic of my next blog??

Events of the Last Week.

I agree, it has been way to long since my last blog. I do not even know where to start. I keep this running list going in the front of my Necessary Chinese Commonplace Book. A Commonplace book, for those of you that have not read any of Lemony Snickets Series of Unfortunate Events, is a book you carry with you every where you go. In my commonplace book, I write down phrases, words, bus routes, stores, anything I may need to recollect at a later time and especially, material I may want to include in a future blog. Well this blog list is so big right now I do not no where to start...So, I have chosen to go with an EVENT THEME as many of the events occur concurrently.


Major Events listed on page 1 of my Commonplace Book:

1. Leak in the apartment


2. Move into a hotel


3. Tree branch smashes Chris's car


4. Tae Kwon Do evaluation


5. Wii

I think I need to start with the Wii. This has been a saga since we arrived in China. We brought our Wii to China with us from the US. I brought the remotes, the nunchucks, the games, the console, the adapters....Well we move in and wait a week to set it up. Only within the first week the TV dies. It takes 10 days to get the TV fixed, but hey it works now. So I plug in my Wii A\C Adapter and poof...all the circuit breakers blow. I reset them and replug in the Wii to a power strip. POOF, it explodes!!! I scream, it smells terrible. Obviously it is a 110V Adapter and the power here in China is 220V. Why would I check, they AC adapters on the computers work fine. Thank God. I now have a project - find a new Wii AC adapter. I search high and low. I mean I had to get Chris to get the company driver, car and translator and spend 8 hours driving around Qingdao, stopping at every place that look promising and begging. Hell, we even tried an electronic parts market to see if they could build us one. I gave up. Then I met Debbie. Debbie casually mentions that on Jimo Lu you can get any Wii game you want. My eyes bug, my heart skips a beat, dare I ask? Well I ask and we head off to Jimo Lu. I buy a Wii adapter and return home. Chris comes home the very same day with guess what - yeah an AC adapter for the Wii!!! Apparently his translator is a miracle worker too. Now, we plug in the Wii. Set up the remotes, start up a game and...and...and nothing happens. Chris asks if I had connected the remote sensor. What!! I never packed a remote sensor. What is a remote sensor? You mean I need a REMOTE SENSOR! So, the Wii saga continues. I will return to Jimo Lu, where they sell the cutest puppies on earth for $15, attempt to return the AC adapter and get a remote sensor.

Now, for the leak in the apartment. Last Saturday morning our downstairs neighbor came up to visit. Well his English is just a bit worse then Chris's Chinese, so the conversation was going nowhere. I happen to overhear a couple of words that I recognize: water and down. So I ask, "Oh is it raining?" Chris immediately looks at me like I am a complete idiot and says, "No, there's a leak." I am truly impressed at Chris's understanding. Can you see the stooge slap coming? The guys comes in and we make a call. Plumbers on the way. Apparently, there is a leak from our apartment into his. The plumbers start in a closet with a hammer and Chisel. 10 hours later, we ask them to leave. They return the next day with a jackhammer. They start in the closet and then move to the bathroom. By this time we have no hot water and the apartment is covered in white dust. They are about to move into the hallway, so I am about to move into a hotel. This is an oversimplification, but you get where I am going.

Meanwhile, there is a terrible ice storm in the North East. My father, you know the guy living in my house, calls to tell me that there is no power and that a tree branch has fallen and smashed Chris's car. The first thought to enter my mind is how did that branch get all the way over the van and land on Chris's car. You see, before we left NH, we strategically parked the new car on the other side of the old van so it would not get damaged. Ignoring the Tolfree (my dad) exaggeration factor I begin to investigate why the car was moved. Get this. It's my fault. Yeah, that's right, I apparently told my father that I wanted him to have the driveway to himself. I told him that I want my cars parked under a giant pine tree that looses branches every winter so that he can have the driveway to himself. That sound so much like me. Not only do I want him to have the driveway to himself, but I have no resentment that he is living in my house. Finally, he says, that it is not his fault that there is an ice storm came and a branch fell. What can I say, he has me there. If he thinks he is getting power of attorney to repair the car, I think Judas Priest sang this for me, He's gotta another thing comin!!

This very same week we had to go to Tae kwon Do every night so that the kids could prepare for a show and their testing evaluation to move up to the next color belt. Well here it is, evaluation day. Talk about cultural experiences. It is a packed theatre. All door locked except for the main entrance. 100 kids sitting on the floor in front of the stage. Tripods set up in all the aisles. Yes, we were the only westerners in the room!!! The show starts off with the National Anthem. It Chinese, so Jackson wants to way its not he one he usually hears in America. Our Tae Kwon Do Master is Koren, so next they play the Korean national Anthem. I guess all the people that sit down must be Chinese. The show open with some traditional music and dance and the cheering squad from Qingdao University perform. Finally the kids are on stage and the exam starts. McKinley has a higher number then Denali, so we are not off to a good start. They all successfully complete the exam and break a piece of wood with there fists. That is all except Jackson. He thinks he is being demoted from a white belt to a rope. I wonder who put that idea in his head. he is done with Tae Kwon Do. He is mad at me for making him do this in the first place....Alas, they all get their yellow belts and peace is restored in the Smith Household!!! Belts were not given out until the following Tuesday, so it was a rough 2 days.

Everything seems back to normal. Or at least what the new normal is. We are back int he apartment, Chris's car is back on the other side of the van, the downstairs neighbor hasn't visited all week and the Wii saga continues!!

I can't seem to find the pictures on my hard drive, so we will have to wait for the visuals.

Dumpster Diving

We have been warning Denali since we came to China. not to wrap her retainers in a napkin. You see, she had her braces removed before we came to China and thus the retainers are a new thing. We have lost a retainer case on a bus, at the zoo and in the apartment, but so far so good, the retainers have survived! That is to say, the survived until Wednesday!!!

No to get ahead of myself, but my stay in China is progressing. We are getting into a routine and I am less nervous when I leave the house. I can actually get in a taxi now and tell the driver where I want to go and how to get there with them understanding me!!! I have also memorized 90% of the bus routes, so when all else fails, we just get on a bus. After all, how big can Qingdao be? Big enough to hold 7 million people!!!

Each Wednesday at noon there is lunch at various locations around Qingdao for expatriates. Me and the kids often go, because, not only do we get to talk in English, but we get a break from each other and meet some very nice people. Well that is where we were this Wednesday afternoon. I now travel with a backpack full of forks. Jackson refuses to eat unless there is a fork. He is all done with Chopsticks, so he tells me. I order sandwiches and of course thee is an egg on it - there is always an egg on everything, what was he expecting, CHEESE? I throw a bunch of forks at him - Fork You - and threaten him within an inch of his life. He happily eats the entire sandwich and ask for another. This whole fork thing will prove significant in a minute or two.

I brought a new friend Ruta from Lithuania to meet everyone. I introduce her to my knight in shining armour - Carla. I have a friend Jackie, who has a friend that lives in Shanghai (Tania), who has a friend that lives in Beijing, who has a friend that used to live in Qingdao (Rebecca), but now lives in Chicago. Rebecca's husband works for the same company as Carla's husband. Thru successive emails and facebook, I am electronically introduced to Carla. Carla has taken me around town so that now I know where to shop and she helped me buy my first map. (I now have 4.) I always call Carla when I am stuck, but not this Wednesday. As Carla, said, I pay it forward.

Me, Rita, Vicky and Carla

Now it is my turn to take Ruta around town and show her the places. So, lunch is finished and off we go. Ruta has a 3 and half year old little girl, Ada. This little girls speaks Lithuanian, but none the less is keen on holding Jack's hand as we walk around town. It was so cute.

Ada and Jack

We walk around for hours and find a Baskin & Robbins Ice-cream shop. We all stop to get a well deserved scoop of ice cream before I head off to Tae Kwon Do with the kids. Denali comes over and asks for a taste of my ice cream. I share, but ask her what she put her retainers to eat the ice cream. Ready, 1, 2, 3......Her face goes pale, she collapses to the ground and I think I am going to have to administer CPR. I know the answer, they are back in the restaurant that we left hours ago!!! I would like to say that most of her fear is resulting from the fact that Chris will have to pay for a new set, but it wasn't. She was afraid of me. McKinley immediates breaks down, "please don't kill her". I didn't yell - I was calm. this was so much more effective then yelling, why can't I use the approach more often.

We all go back to the restaurant and ask the waitress if she found the retainers. Guess what, they don't speak English. I can't even pretend to speak Chinese at this point. Gesturing, pulling on Denali's teeth, nothing gets thru. I have to use my lifeline. I call Sunny. Sunny is the first person I met in China and she is a very nice person. I frantically explain to Sunny what happened and hand the telephone over to the lady for Unny to explain the situation. The lady hangs up the phone and goes about her business. I call Sunny back, I go thru the whole story again and and hand the phone to the lady. The lady and Sunny go back and forth. It is obvious the lady does not want to go thru the garbage!. Sunny is quite the bargainer. She is persistent. The lady hands me phone, puts on gloves and heads out to the garbage.

Sunny & Hubby

I can't let her do that, so I take the gloves and go to the garbage. The whole time I am thinking to myself is this worth $500. It isn't even the money, it is getting new ones, and hoping that her teeth don't shift while we wait. So it is the money, but $5,000. I'll do. I start sifting, one handful at a time. I am trying very hard not to gag. Suddenly there in the garbage is pile of forks!!!!! Holy ------- I am in the right section!!!! I see a glimmer of hope and I feel something, yes, it is the top retainer. I scream in excitement - All the ladies come in and watch now. Now, my limited Chinese returns to me. I can tell them how much money the retainers are worth and they all put on gloves to help. That's it, the barrel is empty, and one retainer still misssing. I'm sweating, I pray to St. Anthony. One last reach into the soupy mix and I emerge victorious!!! I recovered the retainers and survived!!!

The retainers have been boiled and put back into use, so, here is to hoping Denali survives.